One fresh, adult human brain. No previous owners other than original biological growth host. No memories other than those of original growth host, which I will wipe personally. No alterations, no enhancements, no amalgamations from multiple hosts. Full stem, full natural cell count. Any host gender acceptable.
If naturally-aged, original growth host must be under thirty years old. If lab-grown, stasis must be implemented by thirty years of age.
The brain on offer must never have been exposed to contact with any engineered telepath, non-physically-tethered consciousness, or Red Badge Thinker. As such, no brain that has been off-world in ANY CAPACITY (including close orbit) will be considered for purchase.
Beyond this, I do not care how you have come by this brain. Grown or harvested, I don’t want to know. I will not ask, and you will not tell me.
Meet my conditions, and you can name your price (within reason based on market conditions).
I have the means. Accounts verification upon receipt of initial cell sample.
Note: I am not a New Mind Theorist or a Thought Organic. I am not a member of the Fresh Brain movement. I don’t care whether you’re a card-carrying disciple of any of these organizations or a straight-up gray matter hacker with a basement full of wetware. DO NOT respond to this ad to preach to me.
I am simply a citizen who has reached his limit on his current mind and needs a fresh start.
All I care about is the goods, and the goods must be GOOD. Furthermore, by virtue of this request, you should know that I have rejected consciousness merging with any artificial or machine construct. DO NOT contact me to offer any such service, no matter how attractive or infallible you believe it to be.
Final transfer of purchase funds is subject to verification of brain freshness by my own personally contracted service. I don’t care if your product is certified “unused” by the Future Thought Safety Commission, the International Task Force on Recycled Personalities, the Contact Group for the Supervision of Collective Cognition Standards and Ways, or any such “official” organization.
I will NOT negotiate on this point. I have learned the hard way not to trust any verification service whose members I am not personally acquainted with and who can obviously be bribed. That’s how you wake up with a supposedly “fresh” brain to find yourself in the middle of the battle of Cannae, screaming your head off to hold the line against those ****ing elephants, when in reality you’re in the park being dragged away by Security Services (this has happened to me).
In short, if you want to get paid, NO TRICKS. I don’t want to find myself taking on personality characteristics, memories, or habits of any undisclosed previous owners.
If you have tried to mask previous brain ownership/use by replacing twice-memoried temporal lobe cells with clone cells from original host DNA, my analyst will know. If you try to pass off any hybrid human-animal construct brain matter as fully human, my analyst will know (and furthermore will report you to the appropriate authorities).
For negotiation of sale, I have contracted with a third-party private, non-governmental, non-licensed, non-monitored, ex-military virtual-space commerce facilitator. Details below. Reach out to them with a verified and coded DNA print of product and a proposed sale price. When initial details are verified, they will set up our first meeting.
If you have both product and you want to make a lot of money, please respond promptly; time is of the essence. I look forward to doing business with you.
SERIOUS INQUIRIES ONLY.