A recent article in the Atlantic details the new Kiev-based company, Luciding, that wants to be “the Netflix of Lucid Dreaming.”
You will be able to select your dreams for the night, experience them, record them, and rewatch the next day. You could even replay the same dream night after night. And as a lucid dreamer, you will control your actions during the experience.
I get that lucid dreaming could be fun. Who doesn’t want to fly, walk through walls, fight and win battles? And I’d like to turn the tables on the land shark that stalks me across barren dreamscapes.
Even Tim Ferriss seems thoroughly optimistic about the technology.
But sleep is our last unprogrammable life experience. We can distract our brains with any media we desire during waking hours. But in dreams, we are still free.
Not for much longer. The tech isn’t quite there yet, but like almost every other theorized human modification, it’s on the way.
Consider this consequence: Roy Orbison’s song “In Dreams” will sound even creepier than it already does.
It’s fun to talk about our weird/scary/bizarre/idiotic dreams. I recently dreamed that I was watching grizzly bears attack a herd of elephants. My stupid subconscious doesn’t even understand basic continental geography or zoology.
Even so, it was fun to tell people about it.
Now every conversation about dreaming will be as boring as the ones people have about their Netflix queues.
Friend: Hey, did you dream that new Grand Canyon flying tour last night?
Walker: No, I dreamed that I showed up for class naked.
Friend: Sounds boring.
Walker: It was terrifying.
Friend: Why did you pick that one? And why didn’t you just put on some clothes?
Walker: I didn’t pick it. And I wasn’t lucid dreaming.
Friend: You were NATURAL dreaming?? What is this, 2015?
Walker: Netflix upped the price from $10 a month to $12 a month, and I decided that was too much.
Friend: Whatever. I’m going to go talk with interesting people now.
(this scenario also begs the question “why do you have such a sh**y friend?”)
So I’m not quite ready for “the Netflix of lucid dreaming” to be a thing. And I can think of so many better uses for the prefix phrase “the Netflix of…”
The Netflix of Donuts:
$9.99 a month gets me five luxury donuts through the mail, one at a time. I don’t get a new donut until I eat the delivered donut and mail back the donut delivery receptacle. This will not be a problem. I will probably eat the donut at the mailbox and then just put the receptacle right back in.
The Netflix of Puppies:
Self-explanatory. Some weeks I will want beagle puppies, some weeks pugs, and every now and then a Great Dane puppy.
(Note: The Netflix of Puppies will not operate via the postal service.)
The Netflix of Hiking:
I like hiking. I don’t like driving to hiking.
Not sure how the logistics of this would work out, but I’m not an engineer. Get to work, scientists.
The Netflix of Television Shows:
I envision a future in which we can program our televisions to display whatever shows we want, whenever we want.
Some call me a visionary. I prefer “hero genius futurist.”
So there you have it. Maybe none of my Netflix-ish businesses will take off. But for now, I’ve still got dreaming. I like diving into the great unknown each night, even if I can rarely remember where I went the next day.
Maybe it’s nothing but chemicals and neurons and partially-digested donuts, but it still feels like magic.
Are you ready for on-demand dreams? Choosing your experience and controlling your actions within that experience?
Will, until everyone else is lucid dreaming, and I want to be one of the cool kids again.